“What if the world put this desire on your heart and not God?” Recently a couple of my friends and I were talking about some day when get married and have children and all that great stuff we dream about. Wait, let me correct myself- all that great stuff we’re planning on. One of these friends then asked the question, “What if this isn’t what God has planned for me?” I thought it was a simple answer: God places desires on our hearts to move us in the direction He desires us to go, right? Then she answered me with the above question. At the time, it kind of slapped me in the face, but our conversation moved on and all was forgotten. Kind of. Over the next few days, that comment rocked my world, actually it shattered it. I had all these wonderful plans centered around the idea of getting married and having a family someday, and when I asked myself “What if that isn’t my vocation? Or it’s not what God has planned for me?” Everything fell out of my plans. I had everything all planned out, and yeah if God was going to bring some great thing into my life- that’d be awesome, but was I really open to something great if it didn’t fit into these carefully structured plans?
Everyday we’re bombarded with images of the “norm.” What’s normal though? Something that many individuals do or are a part of? If we’re individuals though, shouldn’t we all be different, and if we’re all different than we can’t all be so similar as the world would like us to be, right? After all, God created us each differently than anyone else that’s out there. There is something within us that makes us uniquely us and separated from everyone else. It could be talents, hopes, our whole lives, choices, reasons for those choices, fingerprints, etc. If we conform to the “norm,” be it marriage and children, are we opening ourselves up to live a life that God desires for us. We are His children and as our loving creator He only wants what’s best for us. He is all-knowing after all, shouldn’t He know what the best life for us to live is, rather than the plans we’ve made on our own?
As I opened myself up to the possibility that the vocation of marriage isn’t for me, I’ve been able to look at life a little differently now. I’m not quite sure how to describe it, but there’s a new sense a freedom. I’m not worried about guys- about finding future hubby. Although, I always had faith that God would send the perfect guy along- and not the fictional man alive who is perfect in every way that girls dream about, but a guy who fits with me and who I’d fit with, trying imperfections and all- now I don’t look at this picture impatiently waiting for God to send this guy along. Now, it’s “If.” If God plans to send this guy along, then that’s great. If not, then no biggie, because He’ll have something better in store. Who knows- maybe the real one and only perfect Man alive, aka Jesus, is the guy that God has planned for me. Although, I’m really open to that possibility now, I just find it really difficult to see myself there. I feel like God has placed certain things in my heart that aren’t entirely capable with that vocation, but who knows? For now though, I’m able to fully rejoice in the vocation He has for me at this time in my life. The single life. And I mean fully rejoice it in! There’s no need to worry that my list of relationships is too short or anything like that. I’m an individual. For me, there is no norm, because God didn’t create me to fit into a mold. He’s molded me different than you and every other individual.
How has He molded you? Why are you different? Have you embraced your individuality or are you trying to be part of the “norm,” and fit into a mold?
Think about it... I mean really thing about it! :)
Warm wishes!
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